Disclaimer: This post reeks of meanness and bitchiness. Don't read it if you cannot deal with it. You have been warned! I will not be liable for any adverse impact on your emotional or physical being as a result of reading what's written below.Recently - not so very recently, actually - I came across this miserable piece of junk written by a Twilight fan looking for her own "Edward". Hahahahaha people, Edward is a non-existent fictional character and guys like him don't exist in this world. If u want such a "perfect" guy for yourself, why don't you go to bed early - in fact, you can go sleep now - and find him in your Slumberland. It'd be a better way to pass the time than to write up something like this:
Click to read.Here's what I feel like saying about the above.
I've read the Twilight series and I'm well aware of how Edward purportedly feels for Bella. It feels unrealistic, and that's why it's "hard" for me to read the books. So fake. I would say it is of better quality than the trashy novels that are [insert publishing company name that I censored out because some of my friends positively adore those books] but it's still fake, nevertheless. Disagree? Well, for example, since when do vampires sparkle in the sunlight! Far-fetched addition to enhance Edward's so-called perfection. He should've been portrayed as an angel rather than a vampire, but no, Meyer wanted to add something to make him feel more "dangerous" ie "appealing".
If you don't have a guy to care for you, do little sweet romantic things for you, and the rest of the stuff you envisioned, I feel sad for you. Really. You're not alone, so suck it up and deal with it. Air, food, water is a necessity. A life partner is not. If there isn't anybody to take care of you, then take care of yourself!
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My friend was writing up her own version with the intention to mock the writer of the epistle lol but she has abandoned her project, so I shall take it up.
A "little" about me *sarcastic*:
I'm 5'4, which is considered tall because I live in the part of the world where the hoi polloi are generally vertically challenged. But feel free to forget because my height is unimportant. I'm not 20 yet hahaha and I don't care how old you are, don't respond, i'm not interested. I have long dark black hair, undyed, wavy and coarse XD and squinted dark brown eyes (HAHAHAHAHA) which I try unsuccessfully to enlarge by wearing contact lenses. I think the reason why I am unsuccessful is because my brand of contact lenses is popular only because it is promoted by Wang Lee Hom but whatever.
I'm in shape (yeah, baby) and I work out everyday (walking from one end of the room to the other is counted, right?). I have high metabolism rate like the rest of my family but I eat a lot so you better have loads of money. If you don't it is not fine whether I have money or not.
I tend to view the world cynically because of my upbringing and I'm sarcastic, mean, and unpleasant to be with XD My grandfather sleeps in front of the tv but can never sleep on his bed. The same goes with my mother. I have no such condition yet, but when I grow older, I probably will, too.
I only care about nature as far as whether it looks nice overseas or not when I go on vacation. I'm quiet except when I'm with my friends, reserved unless if I'm comfortable with you, and I simply abhor stupid people and their stupidity. I also can't stand guys who can not, would not, and do not shave, they may think they look manly and mature but in my opinion they look idiotic and 'menyampah'.
I don't drink and I don't smoke so I'm better than people who do XD My personal bad habit is excessive consumption of food and coke. Which reminds me, I haven't yet had my daily dosage, so that's all for today XD
